The Plights of a Black Woman

Am I allowed to be sick?

Can I take time off to rest and recover?

Do I matter?

Black women, on whom the role of the provider has been trussed, mostly those with extended families back home, do not have the privilege of taking time off when sick to rest and recover.

She, unlike her comrades at work, is paranoid that if, as a black woman, a foreigner takes time off, she might lose her job, which I must say is common in most private companies.

She’s just a replaceable number, and how dare she to go sick.

Depression? What is that? A strong black woman can not be depressed you must be joking!

Stressed? Boy, that’s for lazy people, I have no time to be stressed.

I had a conversation with an African lady yesterday on the tube. She has three jobs, and her entire family in Africa depends on her, including her husband and his family. She felt grateful and blessed to be in the UK to work and earn but wished she didn’t have to. She misses her children, but she got an employment visa which means she is the family bread winner.

She asked me to wake her at Kings Cross station if she fell asleep. She works every day, Monday to Sunday. Her only time off is Sunday evening after her cleaning job, which is her third job. She only sleeps 3 to 4 hours per night and additionally naps between journeys to and from work. When we got off, I quickly asked her why she did it and she responded “Sis I have to.” I then asked if she was happy. She asked, “What’s that?” And we went our separate ways.

Why is it that the majority of black women are always impoverished? We must fight and strive for everything, even those privileges that others easily receive.

What is it about a black woman that life never deals her a fair deck of cards?

We need to reassess who we are, what we want out of life and the decisions we make that consequently govern our lives.

There, however, in recent years been a shift in our culture where many black women are changing the direction of their lives by making changes in how they see themselves away from cultural norms and stereotypes.

Many are beginning to put their self and health first and they are not allowing others to manipulate and abuse them. There’s nothing wrong in helping your family and community but not at the cost of your own life. Many are thinking progressively and developing their skills, so they don’t have to work three jobs.

Some questions I regularly ask myself:

Who am I?

What is my purpose?

Where am I here?

What are my weaknesses?

What are my strengths?

What do I want in each day?

What do I want in life?

What do I need out of life?

What are my boundaries?

What can I tolerate?

What wouldn’t I tolerate?

What are my thoughts?

What questions do you ask yourself?

Women, black women, need to encourage and build each other up mentally so that no one is left behind. Strength is in unity.